Me Glitch Bob's Yule Log

Note from MG: Glitch Bob is spending the holidays with us. Since he's experiencing many of our holiday traditions for the first time, I encouraged him to keep a journal. He agreed. (He's very polite and cooperative.)

Note from Glitch Bob: Hi, and welcome to my online journal-thingy. Yule Log. Whatever.

December 25, 2001
Subject: I wonder if the bear is snow-proof...
Mood: On a sugar-high
Me, in the snow.
 
 
 
 
 
 Me, with holiday junk.
It finally snowed today! I was so excited to be rid of boring weather, I ran outside without my scarf. What I really needed was mittens, though. You can only make so many snowballs with your bare hands. I had to go back inside and have hot chocolate to warm myself up.

After that, I got to see what the deal was with having to hang a sock on the wall last night. It was full of candy (more chocolate!) and gifts and stuff. I think my favorite present was a model of a solar car.

I've been hanging out with Dot's bear all day. I still don't know how to send it. The people at the P.O. (that means Post Office here) just gave me a funny look when I went to ask about it.

I was under the impression that after today, my "week of holiday fun" was over. Apparently not.

Now Daisy and MG are going on about another big event that happens soon. Something about a countdown.

A countdown?

That sounds eerily familiar...

This has been such a strange week.

December 24, 2001
Subject: Noggin'
Mood: Thirsty?
Me, with NOG! The nog issue came up again today. It made me wish I hadn't vetoed the mall trip yesterday, because it seemed like they weren't going to let me turn them down twice in a row.

So I let MG pour me a glass of nog.

It looked funny. It smelled funny.

But if I can swallow down a web slug, I can handle a strange holiday beverage.

I took a big gulp.

It was strange... yet somehow familiar.

Sort of like how a quantum shake tastes if you leave it out on the counter all week. (Don't ask how I know what that tastes like. I just do.)

It wasn't that bad, actually. Maybe I'll have another glass before bed.

December 23, 2001
Subject: At first I thought they were kidding...
Mood: Itchy
Me, with my ornament and a ton of glitter. Today Daisy and MG suggested we go to the mall so I could sit on some guy's lap.

I'm sorry, but being a polite guest only goes so far. That's where I draw the line.

Needless to say, we didn't go.

We made ornaments instead. I used lots of glitter on mine, but now I'm starting to wish I hadn't. It got everywhere, and it makes me itch.

I think I'll go take a bath.

December 22, 2001
Subject: Lobbies & lights
Mood: Relaxed
Me, with the statue.
 
 
 Me (and lights), in night-vision.
We went out to eat again tonight. (It was for a birthday or anniversary or something... I lost track.) This restaurant didn't have a plastic tree in its lobby. It had a big gold statue. That was cool. I wish I had a lobby-- I could collect all sorts of things to put in it.

After dinner, everyone got a cookie with a fortune in it. Since I was technically the youngest one there (In the User world, I can order off the kids' menu!) I got to open mine first. My fortune said "A member of your family will soon make you proud. Lucky # 4, 13, 14, 25, 28, 40." Daisy's said the exact same thing. I wonder if that means we're related somehow.

Still no sign of snow-- it was raining when we drove home. We drove by lots of houses with lots of lights. It was like pixels were attacking them, but in a good way.

I'd better go for now. I promised Daisy she could try to braid my hair tonight. (I know what you're thinking. But I only said try. I didn't say it would work.)

December 21, 2001
Subject: Plastic trees!
Mood: Amused
Me, in the waiting room.
 
 
 Me, with a plastic tree.
Today MG and I had to tag along to the hospital for a little while. (And now I know that User blood is red. Go figure.) We were mostly waiting around, but it was actually kind of fun. I got to press the elevator buttons. Plus there were crayons and coloring pages in the waiting room.

But the most entertaining thing was the plastic tree in the waiting room. A little lopsided plastic tree. It was hilarious-- why would anyone manufacture such a thing?

We went out to eat again after that. (This time I decided that if cake was as good as a shake for dinner, pie was as good as cake.) The restaurant had a plastic tree, too. Then I found a plastic tree in the lobby of another building. Apparently they're everywhere! By the time we saw the seventh one, I couldn't stop laughing.

I think I want a plastic tree now. Silliest thing I've seen the whole time I've been here.

December 20, 2001
Subject: At least I'm really good at curling ribbon
Mood: Frustrated
My first attempt at wrapping Dot's present. (And also my feet.)
 
 
 Me, with tape in my hair.
You know what? It's really hard to wrap a stuffed animal when it isn't in a box or something.

Daisy and MG and I were all wrapping presents today. They finished wrapping theirs fast because theirs were in boxes. The bear I got for Dot wasn't in a box.

I tried to make it look nice, but it just wasn't working out. The first time, I cut the wrapping paper too small. Even when I had a bigger piece of paper the present always came out looking lumpy.

I decided to take all the wrapping paper and ribbon back off. I'm just going to put one of those stick-on bows on the bear's head instead. Then all I have to do is send it to Dot.

Of course, I have no idea how to do that from here...

December 19, 2001
Subject: The weather (Now there's a thrilling topic.)
Mood: Cold
Me, with my snowflakes. Did I mention that it's cold here? Because it's really cold here.

I spent this afternoon on the couch with a blanket. I cut out about a million tissue paper snowflakes.

I spent this evening picking little scraps of tissue paper out of the carpet.

MG says it might snow for real next week. I would enjoy that. If it's going to be freezing outside anyway, there may as well be snow.

December 18, 2001
Subject: Cycle Day 1 (I think I've got jet lag...)
Mood: Tired
Me, choosing my meal.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 Me, choosing a gift.
Today I arrived. MG was very happy to see me. She hugged me several times. I think she would have kept hugging me if I hadn't asked her if she could maybe stop for a little while. MG took me to meet her sister, Daisy, who also hugged me. I guess they're big on hugs around here.

They explained that they had a whole week of holiday fun planned. Which sounded like a good thing at first... but then they started babbling about some type of "nog." That part was a little scary.

I think I'm going to try and get through this by pretending I'm a foreign exchange student.

They made me wear a scarf. I only agreed to because I was trying to be polite, but it was good that I did. It was COLD outside. These people need to learn to moderate their weather better.

We went out to eat. I asked if the restaurant served energy shakes. They didn't. They did have cake, though. I decided that was about equivalent to having a shake for dinner.

After that, we went shopping. I decided to get a present for Dot, but I had a hard time finding the right thing for her. There was a pig alarm clock that we all thought was entertaining. Unfortunately, it didn't quite say "Dot." (But if you pressed a button, it said something about bacon and played country music.) Daisy found a teddy bear, and told me girls like that kind of stuff. It didn't quite say "Dot," either. It did say "groovy" on the front, though, and I figured that was pretty close. Plus, MG pointed out that it has scales. She said that might help Dot remember me.

I bought the bear, but not because of the scales. Just because it came with gum.

(So she'll remember me? Now what's that supposed to mean? I'm sure Dot remembers me. Doesn't she?)

I'm feeling kind of low on energy. Maybe it was all that travelling. I think I'll go to bed.

I'm not sure what we're doing tomorrow, but I hope it doesn't involve nog.

Glitch Bob's "Holly Jolly Christmas" is inspired by, made possible by, and dedicated to the extremely kind Claire. (Can you tell we like her?)

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